stressed

i'm in a really bad shape right now that even when little things like accidentally kicking the chair drives me to tears. even as i'm typing this, my fingers are shaking and i am in the brink of crying again.

did you know that stress induces gastric pain? oh yes, they do. and i learned it the hard way.

gosh, i hate being like this. i can't really explain WHY i am being the way i am right now. and this is bad for my work too. i have been pushing my work forward for the past 2 weeks. the truth is, i have so many ideas in my mind for my designs, but the moment i try to put it on designs and codes, everything just went *poof*!

and today, i created like 8 designs and i end up deleting each and every one of it because i hated the end result!

if i were to go with what my heart tells me, i'd book a flight back home to my parents right now. i just wanna go away to a peaceful place where i know people would love and take care of me.

if only i didn't have all these projects going on.. i would've been on the plane already.. :(

what day is this?

Today's officially my lazy day. Or my pissed off day. Or just my lazy day.

Oh yeah, I really am lazy. It's totally LAZY DAY today. I'm too lazy to chat on YM. I'm too lazy to play with my pet on Pet Society (Facebook). I'm too lazy to reply text messages on my cellphone. I'm too lazy to get dress and get out to get my Christmas shopping done. I'm too lazy to get out my PJs!


But if there's one thing I'm not lazy to do today is to complain and get pissed at how one of my roomie love using MY THINGS for her own pleasure.

You see, I don't mind sharing my things with people. I don't mind sharing my food with you if you're hungry. Heck, I even share my food with the stray dogs and cats whenever they came over to where I was seated. I don't mind sharing my expensive shampoo or expensive shower gel - because I know it smells good and you probably couldn't afford that luxury - I couldn't afford it too, but I saved my money to get that.

But I mind people USING my hanger to dry their laundry!

Seriously... for hygienic purpose, I REALLY, REALLY do mind sharing my hanger and stuff at the laundry area. I mean, can't you even afford to buy cheap hangers? SERIOUSLY?!! Or do I need to TELL you that you need to buy your own hanger?? Geez, even my other roomie knows that he needs to buy his OWN hanger - I didn't even have to ask him!

I've been nice enough to let you use my drying place (I don't know what you call that thing you hang your hanger and clothes on to dry them outside) that when I needed them to hang my own clothes, I'll just move your clothes THAT WAS USING MY HANGER to the other side. Yet, you still don't get the clue.

Well I'll tell you this once (when you come back home later) to get your own hanger. The next time I dry my laundry and see you're still using my hanger, I might throw your clothes on the floor.

You're still welcome to use my "drying place" tho.