December 27, 2007

Merry Christmas!

OMG OMG OMG finally get to blog today!!! Yahooo!!!! I've been wanting to blog since the day I arrived back home, but thanks to stupid Telekom people in Kunak who couldn't be bothered to fix our phone line (despite numerous calls, complaints and reports made to them for the past 2 months) .. I had to put my blogging activity to a halt. But all thanks to my friend, Nizam, who left his Celcom 3G stuff over here, I could "tumpang" and blog! But .. OMG lah, the connection is pathetically SLOW!!! It gets disconnected every now and then.. I can't even upload photos to show you. :-(

Worse part is: I can't even do any paid posting...

I am still back in Kunak at the moment. It's raining currently ..and brrrrr.... it's soooooo cold! My family and I went to Tawau earlier today to get some salted fish and dried prawns. We also went for some seafood later. Loads of them! Like 6 huge plates of dishes (not including rice) for 5 person. Gawd, I've been doing nothing much these days but eat, eat, eat and eat. I am geting fatter!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway, I gotta stop now. I need to take my shower. It's almost 2 AM and I'm really, really tired already. Need to get up early tomorrow to fetch my sis to the airport. She's going back to her college tomorow.. :-( I'll try to blog again if stupid Kunak Telekom finally fix our phone line. I think Nizam's taking back his Celcom 3G tomorrow... no more Internet. *sob*

Oh by the way, for some reason, I can't access to my other blogs: Foreign Beauty and Once Upon A Time.. that explains why I'm blogging over here. Heheh.

Until then, take care everyone.

Merry Christmas!!!!! :D

December 19, 2007


I wanna cry. God, I wanna cry. I've been so emotional since a few days ago. While other people would be jumping in joy to go back to their families on Christmas.. I am having mixed feelings about it. Oh don't get me wrong. I am HAPPY to meet my parents. I am HAPPY that I could finally meet them after almost 2 years of not being back home. But the only thing that's taking me back is the thought of leaving what I have back here in KL.

My bedroom. My close friend. My shopping trip. My new life.

It's not easy adapting to new places, new bedroom, new life.. you know. And I have this tendency of getting too attached to something, like the bedroom for instance. Once I've grown attached to it, it's really hard for me to let go. You must be thinking that I'm crazy for having this kind of thought, yes? But that's the truth.

And since nobody reads this blog (ok, maybe just a few readers) I'm comfortable to say what I really feel inside: I am lonely. Going back home means I have my parents and my siblings.. and my church friends around me. But I do not have REAL friends to celebrate Christmas with. In fact, I do not have any close friend that I could go out with on Christmas day, let's not even mention New Year.. As a child, we move around quite a lot of times. Moving from one school to another. And I am not the kind of person who makes friends easily, because I am very picky when it comes to making friends. Besides... it's not that easy to find someone who can really understand you, go along with your temper and your unpredictable mood swings. I know. I admit that. I have a terrible temper sometimes. Even my parents knew about it.

Shit. I need to stop typing. The more I talk, the more emo I get. Maybe I should just get married and have someone to come home to.


Am I even ready to start a new family? Am I ready to share my life with a man? Can I decorate our house according to my taste and have as many plants and pets as I want? (I know, I could be very greedy sometimes..) Can my "husband" accept the fact that I do not cook as often as other wives would? Can he accept that I do not want to do all the house chores alone? God.. I can't even bear the thought of washing all the clothes everyday!


Okayyy.. I think I'm going crazy already. I should just watch some tv serie and wait till it's time to go to the airport. I might even delete this entry later. I don't know. And since this blog was setup for my future children and grand children to read, I'd like to tell them something.

"I am a very confused person. Please do not grow up to be one like me. And oh, I was the Bintang Kaamatan in Kunak once. Your mother/grandmother can sing!"


December 16, 2007

Flat ass for christmas

Ahh.. finally done with my Christmas shopping. Gifts for my family, gifts for myself, new dress for me, new shoes for me, new haircolor for me.. and new boyfriend for me. KIDDING!!

I also managed to complete ALL my paid posting assignments. Ass also pain oledi from sitting too long. I have to finish it up before going back to Sabah this Wednesday, because I doubt I'll have time to blog over there. It will heavily depend on what we'll do back home. Probably food, food and more food. Die lah! I'm gonna grow even fatter!

Anyway, my brain is juiceless now. Squeezed dry. Cannot think anymore lah. I think I'll stop blogging for a while and spend some time on my KL bed. I'm gonna miss it terribly! (even right now, the thought of leaving it makes me wanna cry. *sob*)

December 14, 2007

I'm making a list and checking it twice.. and i suck

Just a few days more before I take that flight back home, yet here I am, still not done with my Christmas shopping! Panic mode is beginning to slip in. Damnit it's Friday already. If I don't shop today, I'll get stuck in between people's armpit tomorrow at the shopping mall. Weekends are definitely NOT a good idea to shop on holiday season like this here in KL.

By hook or by crook, I have to buy my new clothes and shoes TODAY. But damn.. I'm having my period and the fact that it's the first day (not forgetting the PAIN) and my mood is getting rotten by the hour is not helping at all.

Damnit! Sometimes I hate being a woman. MEN SHOULD GET PERIOD INSTEAD!

December 13, 2007

Mocha and Raspberry Trifle

This recipe is too good to ignore. I just had to post it for my future reference!


For syrup
3 tablespoons water
2 tablespoons sugar
3 tablespoons Cognac or other brandy

For mocha pastry cream

2 cups whole milk
1 tablespoon instant espresso powder
1 vanilla bean, split lengthwise
6 large egg yolks
3/4 cup sugar
1/4 cup cornstarch
3 ounces bittersweet (not unsweetened) or semisweet chocolate, chopped
1 3/4 cups chilled whipping cream

For assembly
2 purchased 8-inch-diameter, 1- to 1 1/4-inch-thick round sponge cakes, each cut horizontally in half
3/4 cup raspberry preserves (about 10 ounces)
2 cups fresh or frozen raspberries (unthawed)
2 cups fresh raspberries
2 tablespoons red currant jelly, melted with 1 tablespoon water
1 1/2 teaspoons sugar
Red currant bunches or red grape clusters (optional)


Make syrup:
Combine 3 tablespoons water and sugar in small saucepan. Bring to boil over medium-high heat, stirring until sugar dissolves. Remove from heat. Mix in Cognac. Cool.

Make mocha pastry cream:
Combine milk and espresso powder in heavy medium saucepan. Scrape in seeds from vanilla bean; add bean. Bring to simmer. Remove from heat. Discard bean. Using electric mixer, beat yolks and sugar in large bowl until very thick, about 3 minutes. Sift in cornstarch; beat to blend well. Gradually beat hot milk mixture into egg mixture. Return mixture to saucepan. Whisk over medium heat until mixture comes to boil, about 3 minutes. Remove from heat. Add chocolate. Whisk until chocolate melts and mixture is smooth. Transfer to medium bowl. Place plastic wrap directly onto surface of pastry cream. Refrigerate until cold, about 3 hours. (Can be made 2 days ahead. Cover syrup and store at room temperature. Keep pastry cream refrigerated.)

Whisk cold pastry cream until smooth. Using electric mixer, beat whipping cream in large bowl until medium-stiff peaks form. Transfer 1 1/2 cups whipped cream to another medium bowl; set aside to use as topping. Stir 1/3 of remaining whipped cream from large bowl into pastry cream to lighten. Fold remaining whipped cream from large bowl into pastry cream in 2 additions.

Place 1 cake layer in bottom of 8-inch-diameter, 3-quart trifle bowl. Brush 1/4 of syrup over cake. Spread 3 tablespoons raspberry preserves over cake. Spread 1 cup pastry cream over. Arrange 1/2 cup fresh or frozen raspberries atop pastry cream. Repeat layering 3 times with remaining cake layers, syrup, preserves, pastry cream and 1 1/2 cups fresh or frozen raspberries.

Spread reserved 1 1/2 cups whipped cream over trifle. Top whipped cream with 2 cups fresh raspberries. Lightly brush red currant jelly mixture over raspberries. Sprinkle with 1 1/2 teaspoons sugar. Garnish with red currant bunches or grape clusters, if desired. Cover and refrigerate at least 3 hours. (Can be prepared 8 hours ahead. Keep refrigerated.)

December 12, 2007

What I have been up to..

December 11th

8PM: Watched "Moonlight" series.
Slept halfway during the show.

December 12th

3AM: Accidentally woke up. Hungry.
Made myself some half boiled eggs.

5AM: Went back to bed.
Took me a few decades of the rosary and hymns till I could finally fall asleep.

9:45AM: Woke up.
Checked my email. Reply emails and text message.

11AM: Had a glass of milk shake and a slice of cheese.

Currently: Watching E! on Astro. :-P
I need to take my shower and change soon. I need a new hair cut!!!

December 10, 2007

Help Me Name My Teddy!!

Can you please name my Teddy?

Please go to my personal blog and choose a name from the poll.

Thank you!! :D

December 2, 2007

December Is HERE!

Hurray!!! My favorite month is here!!!!!

Welcome December!! I can't wait for Christmas to come!! Free presents and beautiful Christmas tree!!! :D :D :D